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Sunday, January 2, 2011

The Year of Living Stupidly, Part 2: Electric Boogaloo

In our last Wedgie, we regifted some of our favorite stories from last year. And, it being the holiday season, of course we have lots of leftovers. So today we present: 2010, The Year of Living Stupidly, Part Duh: Stupid Criminals Edition.

Because he didn’t have any breadcrumbs
From Australia: Man charged with multiple robberies posts bail, immediately breaks into several more homes, leaving his police charge sheet at the scene of one crime and the DVD of his police interview at another.

Current mood: Stupid
Big Coppitt Key, Fla.: 18-year-old man breaks into home, steals items, logs onto his My Space page and leaves. Forgetting to log off.

I m so s2pid, LOL
Lindale, Texas: Woman intending to text her pot dealer to set up a buy mistakenly sends text to Smith County Sheriff’s narcotics team.

Uhh, we’ll be in touch
Barrie, Ontario: 40-year-old woman shoplifts clothing from store, then wears the stolen outfit back to the store the next day to interview for a job. After meeting with the store manager and handing over her resume, the woman is then spotted on store security cameras stealing more items.

Smoke ‘em if you got ‘em
Jacksonville, Fla.: After getting kicked out by his girlfriend, man returns to her house the next day and breaks back window. When police arrive, man tells them he still has clothes inside, so his ex lets him and the cops in. Man can’t find his stuff, but he does find a bag of pot, which he tells the cops is his, at which point, according to the officers, he asks them if it would be okay if he “smokes his weed.”

Don’t go off half-caulked
From Austin, Texas: Man tries to rob gas station with caulk gun, attendant fights back with plastic trash can, robber flees in red pickup truck with Kenneth, the transgender prostitute he’d picked up earlier. The Aristocrats!

2 comments:

  1. Ha! Re.: "Uhh, we'll be in touch" - hmm, maybe this is a good solution if I ever go on a job interview again! :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. I think that guy lives in the Madison Tower.

    ReplyDelete