Space, where no one can hear you scream, “WTF????”
Here at the Daily Wedgie, we’ve had a couple of WTF moments lately, courtesy of those two Republican rocket scientists, Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann. You know, a couple of those moments that, as Palin might put it, aspire us to go, “WTFuck did she just say?”
The first of those moments came the other day when Bachmann, speaking to an Iowa anti-tax group, claimed that America’s founding fathers “worked tirelessly until slavery was no more in the United States.” She went on to describe her version of the founding of America:
“How unique in all of the world, that one nation that was the resting point from people groups all across the world. It didn't matter the color of their skin, it didn't matter their language, it didn't matter their economic status.... Once you got here, we were all the same. Isn't that remarkable? It's absolutely remarkable.”
It is remarkable. Absolutely remarkable that someone without a functioning brain is actually in the United States Congress.
But just when you thought the Republicans couldn’t get any more remarkable, along comes Sarah Palin. The half-governor of Alaska, speaking with Fox News’ Greta van Susteren, was attempting to make fun of President Obama’s "Sputnik moment" line from his State of the Union speech. Instead she just ended up proving that she's still lost in space.
Here’s what she said:
“That was another one of those WTF moments, when he so often repeated this Sputnik moment that he would aspire Americans to celebrate. And he needs to remember that what happened back then with the former communist USSR and their victory in that race to space, yes, they won, but they also incurred so much debt at the time that it resulted in the inevitable collapse of the Soviet Union.”
"WTF?" Really, former Governor? OMFG, how presidential you are. Yes, STFU Barack Hussein Obama, and remember that when your socialist buddies the Russkies sent that Sputnik into space, they might have won the “race to space,” but that’s what caused the former communist USSR to collapse… 30 years later. Take that, Reagan!
Welcome to the new space race. Palin v. Bachmann, boldly going where no man has gone before. To the Planet Moron.
So now here we are, 2011 in America, 42 years after Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and took “one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.” Only we seem to have taken that giant leap backwards instead. Now, instead of Dwight Eisenhower, a republican who today would be branded a flaming liberal, we have the dueling space cadets, Bachmann and Palin. Just think, in the past 20-odd years (and hoo-boy, have they been odd!) the Republicans have given us the following devolution: From Dan Quayle’s empty potatoe, to the original space cowboy, W, and now Palin and Bachmann. Who’s next? A poo-flinging monkey? No, come to think of it, even a poo-flinging chimp makes more sense than Sarah Palin.
To paraphrase another famous astronaut, Star Trek’s “Bones” McCoy: She’s dim, Jim.